January 4th, 2012 at 8:33PM
If Famous Writers had Written Twilight

romeo-isbleeding:

Cormac McCarthy
In the opening scene, Edward dashes Bella’s head against a rock and rapes her corpse. Then he and Jacob take off on an unexplained rampage through the West.

James Joyce
Edward’s rapacious love for Bella reflects the way globalism has pillaged Ireland. It’s entirely written in Esperanto, with sections in untranslated Greek, except for Chapter 40, which is inexplicably rendered as a script page from the musical The Book of Mormon.

Ernest Hemingway
Edward and Bella exchange terse dialogue alluding to Edward’s anatomical problem. Eventually, Bella leaves him for Jacob, a local bullfighter with a giant…sense of entitlement.

etc 
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    Yes, you’re welcome! :)
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    I was disappointed that he didn’t make the list, so I took it upon myself to include him.
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    Fucking Kate Chopin.
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1,136 notes Source: bookriot #Twilight
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